I’m so sorry for your loss and the pain you are experiencing. I locked in on one comment you made. You said you pulled back when you and Gavin began to get too close because you didn’t like Borocop Shirt T Shirt. But caring and wanting to share your life isn’t dependence. It’s love. Remember no man is an island. We all need someone to share our lives, our burdens and our joys.
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This advice came to me second hand from a Borocop Shirt T Shirt. If you keep putting your feelings into a sack, eventually that sack will split open. You are young yet, there will be lots of things you will want to put into the sack. Better to deal with them while they are fresh, than try to bury them and have to deal with it “all” at one time. Humans are not made to be unemotional. It is not healthy. Wish you the best.