My daughter was about 3. I was planning date night with the Messy Bun Mom Just Call Me Pretty And Take Me Racing Motorcycle shirt and had gotten off work early to have my hair done. Hubby was recently back from an extended tour and a friend was going to watch my daughter overnight to give me and Hubby a little space to reconnect. We’d booked a reservation at a swanky restaurant and hotel downtown.In those days I usually kept my hair in a stylish “Lob” (longer style bob) but had let it grow out while Hubby was away and I didn’t have much time to keep it trimmed. I’d resorted to a messy bun as it was growing out and my stylist loved the new length and suggested I keep it. She gave me a really beautiful new hairstyle and though I knew I was going to cut it later because it was too much work to keep up it still worked for date night. But I was totally unprepared for my daughter’s reaction to the new do.
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When I arrived at her daycare to pick her up, she looked totally startled and then turned somber and just stared at Messy Bun Mom Just Call Me Pretty And Take Me Racing Motorcycle shirt. She kept staring and was quiet in the car all the way home. Not like her usual chatty self at all. Later as I was giving her a bath and in her pj’s before my friend came, I caught her staring again so I said, “I got my hair done to look pretty for Daddy.” She replied, “I know.” So I asked, “Don’t you like it?” She frowned a little and said, “It makes me sad. You always wore your hair like that when you were Vanessa.” I immediately corrected her and said, “You mean I look like Vanessa. Is that someone new at your daycare?” She answered, “No. You were Vanessa. I was Mom.”The whole thing didn’t make sense to me but she seemed so uncharacteristically somber that I became curious as I was carrying her in a towel to the bedroom to get her PJ’s. I stopped and asked, “When were you Mom?” She looked at me and grabbed my face exasperatedly looking me in the eyes and said “From BEFORE!” When you were Vanessa and I was the Mommy! From BEFORE!!”I stood there for a second and was about to ask her ‘When was Before?’ but the doorbell rang. Hubby called out and I rushed to get her in her PJ’s. The moment was lost.